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Ambiguistan 'appears on the map'. Citizens worried.

The small Middle-Eastern nation of Ambiguistan today appeared in the spotlight for the first time. Citizens there are concerned the nation may now be a target for international 'assistance'.

Due to a major oversight in the Foreign Affairs office of Ambiguistan, other countries became aware of its existence today.

Ambiguistan. Somewhere there-ish

The Minister for Foreign Affairs sent out the following press release: "The Sovereign Nation of Ambiguistan would like it to be known that it does not have a Ruthless Dictator, never ever carries out atrocities and is generally peacable and Judeo-Christian". He has since resigned having realised nobody had noticed before.

The self-styled 'Ruthless Dictator' later held a press-conference denying the existence of the nation. "We could not possibly be carrying out atrocities due to the fact we do not exist," he said. "Were we to exist, I would obviously deny these claims, but as we don't there is nothing for you to see here. Please move along." he continued while staring at his feet, before scratching the back of his ear shiftily and ambling away.

National facts:

Population: Dictators (1). Plebs (unknown)
Capital: Oligopoli
Area: 0.1 million sq km (0,1 sq miles)
Major language: Totalitish
Major religion: Judeo-Christian. Honest.
Life expectancy: 62 years (men), 68 years (women), 17 years (government informers)
Monetary unit: 1 limb (Lb) = 5 digits
Main exports: n/a
GDP per capita: n/a
National Anthem: 'Land of the slightly more free than other nearby dictatorships'

Citizens are worried that the attention this will bring may lead to foreign 'help' of the kind that is common in the region today, and led very private outcries against the government for fear of their lives. One man who did not wish to be identified said "We may live in a ruthless autocracy, but it's our ruthless autocracy. At least when someone disappears at the moment we know it is down to the Secret Police. What kind of certainty will we have now?". He then added "Hey guys, did you know Britney is pregnant by Michael Jackson" then he pointed into the air, shouted "Look!! It's Osama Bin Laden" and ran off. No trace was found in the vicinity of Osama Bin Laden.

It has since been noticed that Ambiguistan has dropped off the map again, due to the release of a new Eminem single.

World News | | author: Tom - 2005-04-13
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